Beard - World Beard and Moustache Championships 2013 - Sunday

Friday
Saturday
Sunday

Today was more about Stuttgart than beards, the flight was cheaper on a Monday than a Sunday so we decided to take an extra day to do some sight seeing around the city. It was a pretty late start to the morning with dull heads and I had a wry smile, waking in the knowledge that I had the tenth best full freestyle beard in the world! THE WORLD! Once we had showered and dressed ourselves we headed to the train station and headed for the city centre. we got the admin task of printing boarding passes out the way first, before finding coffee and pastry based breakfast in a local cafe.

We then spent some time just wondering around the town checking out the local civic buildings and public art, some of which had to be mounted for the camera. I'm not saying we are seasoned subtle travellers, and we are not quite the 'Brits abroad'. We are somewhere in-between. We had walked around the majority of the city before we decided it was time for coffee and cake and found a lovely little theatre cafe, which served great cakes and coffee, the only problem was that we had sat in the smoking part of the cafe, which was a bit of a pain.

After our second cafe stop we went out in search of geocaches and postcards for my gran. Once these tasks were out of the way we were full on culture vultures and went to the Stuttgart fine art and contemporary art gallery, which was huge and had some very interesting art. fine art has never really excited me, but it was a nice way to spend an hour or so. We then headed to the bar were we had arranged to meet a fellow competitor and his mates.

We'll just have a couple of jars as I hate travelling with a hangover.

Well.

That plan didn't last long. Even though it was early November we all stood outside the bar and drank beer, drank wine, ate pizza and with one of the Irish crew pulling out a guitar we formed the 'Smoking elbows'. We sang and drank for hours any passer bys were impromptu-ally serenaded, and frequently joined in the revelry. We partied until the bar closed around midnight and we slowly wondered back to catch the last train back to our hotel.

Beard - World Beard and Moustache Championships 2013 - Saturday

Friday
Saturday
Sunday

It was a thick head and dry mouth that welcomed me to Saturday morning. But a shower and toothbrush soon sorted me out. I started my beard and moustache grooming with curlers and a hair drier to give it the basic shape, neatened and stiffened it up with a little hair 'clay' and moustache wax, before getting my costume on and then heading to Aldi for breakfast and supplies for the day.

If was over whelming at the Filldehalle with bearded chaps wondering around all over the place speaking dozens of different languages, I had no idea what queue to join or where to stand. I found the wonderful gentlemen of the The British Beard Club, who helped point me in the right direction. It took about 40 minutes of queues and forms and being prejudged. "Yes, you have a beard, please continue". It took a while but I was officially entered, registered and qualified to compete. No sooner was I done with the admin side of the day, and the parade started. We where organised by our country and paraded around main hall to the cheers and applause of the spectators and press.

The competition then started. It was running late, but it didn't matter. The first competitions were for those with moustaches. It was great to such an array of different moustache styles, sizes and colours. Everyone was cheering and supporting the more elegant and distinguished of the hairy brotherhood. It was a slow moving procession but great fun to be a part of. Having German beer also helped make things run a little quicker for the spectators. Some of the people i got chatting to were just brilliant fun. not only did they grow their moustache, but they took on the moustaches entire character. I met this wonderful Finnish chap who was robbed of a top three position in the Dali moustache category. He wasn't shy of the camera.

After moustache categories came the partial beard categories, including fu-man-chu, goatee and partial freestyle. The big guns were starting to come out. I also managed to meet one of my bearded heroes, Mr Willi Chevalier who has an incredible white triple loop moustache and beard. Makes my scruffy attempt look rather amateurish. He was a nice chap who didn't speak much, but was happy to a few photos. Once the partial beards had been judged they moved on to the full beards. This was the real deal, with giant beards and some extravagant costumes. It was late in the afternoon now and the beers were slowly taking their toll, it was getting closer to my category so I was drinking more beers and making more trips to the toilets to work in more and more wax.

When it finally came to my category it was touching on 10 pm, the audience were nicely rowdy, with the Swiss supports going crazy with giant cow bells and the loudest cheering. But they were closely followed in the loudest cheering by the Hungarians who shouted loudly and flashed their sabres (not a euphemism) in encouragement to their favourites and countrymen. It was pretty nerve racking standing amongst the greatest beards in the world, but it was also great fun. When I was invited forward to present my beard to the judges and audience I took the opportunity to jump down form the stage and shake each and every hand of the judges as they had had the longest day of everyone here. I small hat trick for the audience and I took my place back in line and cheered and clapped on my fellow competitors.

The scores were read out, and I was not in last place and definitely outside the top three, so I was very happy we watched the closing ceremony with the winners posing on stage for photos and being handed their trophies. It was close to midnight when we started rolling out the conference centre, and someone had left a trophy on the table so I posed for a quick photo. It was too late in the suburbs to find an open bar to celebrate in, so we headed back to the hotel to wash the wax out of the beard and get some well earned shut eye.

This has been an incredible day and i met some incredible people many thanks to all the teams and organisers involved

http://www.worldmoustachechampion.com/neueSeiten/bart/WM%202013%20LE/welcome.html
http://www.wbma.info/
http://thebritishbeardclub.org/

Beard - World Beard and Moustache Championships 2013 - Friday

Friday
Saturday
Sunday

Me and my 2 pals flew over to Stuttgart on the Friday early evening arriving in Stuttgart around 8 pm local time. The passport control staff at airports are usually stern faced and give nothing away. But they have been faced with dozens of hairy travellers who, like me have probably grown their beards since having their passport photos taken. Once through customs it was only a couple of stops on the S-Bahn to our hotel, were we dropped off our kit and headed towards the welcoming party at the venue of tomorrows competition.

We had only walked 10mins before we came across a small bar with the football on, so we wondered in, sat down, and waited to be waited on. The bar maid quickly took our order and it was only a minute before we had our hands on a great pint (500 ml) of cold crisp German Pils. Prost! Stuttgart's football team wasn't doing to well and the bar went deadly quite during the game, so we finished our beer and slipped out nice and quite and paid our tab. It wasn't long before we were at the venue with a new beer in our hand sitting around watching fellow beardy types potter about and talk about curlers, straighteners, waxes, gels and hairsprays. IT was fun but we were starving, and the evening was starting to come to an end here.

We headed off in search of food and found a small Greek bar / restaurant which told us they had stopped serving food but could do a salad for us. This was perfect, we had a salad and a few bowls of French fries washed down with Irish beer and then another German Pils. Once we had our fill we headed back to the hotel to crash out, it had been a long day.

Beard - Practicing for the world championships

Shampoo

Drip Dry

Roll

Sculpt 

Tweak

Divide

Sub Divide

Race - The Summer Beast - 15th Sept 2013

I love this race, I can rock up, run a 10 mile obstacle course and then quietly disappear afterwards. The simple, raw feel of the race is great, no "HooRa's", "Hell Yeah's" or "Ar Roo's". Its a hilly trail run through a magnificent horse trials course with an added water obstacle. Having the option to complete one or two, 5 mile loops was never a real option for me. Of course I'll be pushing myself for 10 miles. I have done this race 3 or 4 times now and always enjoyed the tough terrain and the fast pace of the race.

I somehow ended up on the front row of the starting line, and from the countdown I took the lead for the first half mile. I then made a pretty dumb decision at the water wade. I took a wider route and chose to swim rather than wade. This cost me lots more time and energy, and by the time I was out of the water the the lead had been taken by a dude in black and he was pulling away with ease.

After the water the course becomes pretty hilly and and just don't have the legs to pound up these bad boys, I was starting to loose the odd place but after the first lap I was pretty confident I was in the top 10. The second lap was hard going every horse jump seemed higher, slippier, and harder to leap. I made a better decision to wade rather than swim on the second lap which made life much easier. My male chauvinism came into play half way round the 2nd lap with the fastest lady on the course gaining on my and hanging on to my heels. I was determined not to be beaten by a lady, and pushed hard to try and loose my skirt wearing shadow (she was wearing shorts not a skirt, but it doesn't alliterate as nicely as skirt) but I just couldn't shake her. In the final mile she pulled away and took a good 10 seconds from me, I was happy with my efforts, and my legs were screaming and lungs gasping, I couldn't have run any harder.

When finishing I caught up with the lady and congratulated her and a few other male runners I had been trading places with all morning. I quickly grabbed my keys from the key drop and headed home. I usualy stop for one of the stunning burgers from the local butchers stall. But today I was rushing back as i was on taxi duties in the afternoon, and have DIY jobs to deal with.

A great race, an incredible challenge and for the first time I ran every step (apart from stopping at a water station) including the uphills.

http://thebeastrun.co.uk/

Race - Wilne 10km - 1st September 2013

I'ld not heard of the Wilne 10km run until Team Derby Runner members had posted on Facebook about it. I didn't even know where Wilne was. Turns out its a small village only 20 minutes away from my house and even closer to my sister's. So, me, the missus (not running) and my sister head over, park up and head to the registration tent to pick up the race packs. This event is much bigger than I expected with half a dozen massage tables set up, The Nottingham Runner stall set up selling kit, and other tents and activities for children and runners. Once I had my number pinned on and chip attached I did a few stretches and drank some more water.

In my post holiday guilty haze I decided that September would be booze free and refined sugar free. So as a final splurge, last night, I ate half a Salty Caramel Briton Cake, washed down with a can of 1664, and then went to the pub and had 3 more pints of lovely English real ale. It was a great evening of catching up with mates and talking quite a lot of crap, mainly on the subject of "Are foxes canine or rodents?". Needless to say, I was on the loosing side.

So this is why I was slightly green and sweaty before I even started. Annoyingly I had been training quite hard during the last 2 weeks on holiday, and had been aiming for a sub 44 minute time. I pretty much threw this out the window today and would be happy with anything under 50 minuets and not have to vomit on the course. Once at the starting point I nudged up towards the front but was still about 20 lines back when it started to become impolite to push any closer. After 10 minutes of waiting in the blocks comparing pre race preparation techniques with fellow Team Derby Runner members, Sheena (my sister) and Rob. Rob's was a big greasy hot curry, and Sheena's was massive 16 mile run! I thought I was bad having cake and beer, I think I'll stick to my terrible pre race prep!

Running hard not to vomit at wilne 10km

When the gun went it took a good 20 to 30 seconds to reach the start line with the usual concertinaing effect generated by an enthusiastic start. I was happily making progress through the 1st km overtaking when I could. I spotted a TDR vest in front and was slowly trying to make my way towards him when another TDR vest came past me, I tried to keep up with him to reach TDR number 1. But TDR runner number 2 who came past me was far too quick and he pulled away and overtook his team mate and was out of sight. As I reached the 3km mark last night's beer was causing my stomach to churn uncomfortably and I was happy to stop when my laces need a re tie. Just round the corner from the 3km mark was a TDR member and her kids watching and supporting the race. Her two younglings bounced and cheered which momentarily help my nausea fade and enjoy the race. That feeling didn't last long.

Because of the layout and 'almost two laps' route, after about 4.5 km you are presented with the finish line. Usually the finish line is a energy burst but this was demoralising and painful, knowing I wasn't half way yet and feeling pretty rough. Luckily the water station wasn't too far away and a couple of cups of water did give me a bit of a boost. At the 5km marker I was surprised to see I was at 21m30s. Hold on. I'm on target for a sub 44! It's going to be hard to keep the last 5km at decent pace, but I have to give a go. It was hard on the second lap, the open part of the roads with no shade was an absolute killer, draining my already dehydrated body further. When the shade covered the road I perked up and ran hard and cought up with the lady that passed me at the 6km marker. I managed to keep her in my sights, and was hugely motivated by her heavy breathing. Not in a pervy way, but it showed how much effort she was putting in. Was I putting that much effort in? could I put more effort in? turned out, I was was running at maximum pace. hamstrings where getting very sore, energy was very low, but I managed to carry on pushing and keep on her heels.

To tired to vomit now at the Wilne 10km

I final cheer from the TDR youth supports club around the 8km marker and I knew I was going to finish and with a respectable time. The 9km marker came and went and I felt I was pushing hard and Miss Heavy Breathing was still leading me out and picking off other runners too. She was a great pace setter. when I got to the 400meter mark I glanced at my watch and it was at 42m20sec. Hold on in my interval training I was running 400 meters in about 1m30s. HAMMER TIME. I pushed as hard as I could, I didn't have the legs or energy for a sprint finish, but managed to press past the lady who had dragged me through the last 4kms and crossed the line hit stop on my watch and glanced at the finish line timer. The timer said 44m34s and my watch said 44m08s, as I had started it as I crossed the start line. Very close to my goal, even with a dodgy hangover and a shoe lace stop. It was a PB for me too, Next 10km road race target now has to be a sub 43!

Just after crossing the line I turned to thank the lady and she asked what time I got, and congratulated me on a PB too. She was happy that she had contributed to my success. I then Grabbed water from Ness and sat and watched other TDR memebers come in, once Sheena was over the line we took the slow walk back to the event village to pick up our t-shirt and race goodie bag, and cought up with guys from The Nottingham Runner. before heading back to the car.

Thanks to Sarah for the photos too.

In Summery:

I very pleasant course, with a great turn out from the public and local, very happy with my time and super slick organisation and support team. I will be back next year!

http://www.wilne.co.uk/
http://www.nottinghamrunner.com/

Race - Total Warrior 10mile - 4th August 2013

Total Warrior 10 miles - Clean at the start of the race

I reviewed and took you through the course yesterday on the 10km race, and today is the same course but with an added 3.8 mile trail run which I'll come to later on.

Again the morning started with a very pleasant walk through Shap village to the event village, and the super slickness continued with registration and bag dropping. Even the pre gun motivation and briefing seem that little bit slicker today, and the gun music today was the rousing fire starter from prodigy. I wasn't planning on running with Pete from Mudstacle but from the gun I took a nice wide route to avoid the crush, on the first downhill Pete's long legs came in to their own bounding down the hill in about three giant steps. I caught up with him on the uphill, and so the day went for the next hour and 45 mins, with Pete and myself running together, overtaking on obstacles or runs. It was great to pushed to catch up after the obstacles I struggled on, and felt good to pull away on the obstacles and runs I felt more at ease on.

Total Warrior 10 miles - In full hippy mode

On the 3.8 run it was 2 miles of uphill slog through wet soaked marshland, the hills were not too step but the constant drag force the group of runners we were in to take breaks for walking. Anyone who ran the entire way to the top is a legend and deserves huge respect and a free massage. The run back to the main course was incredible. Stunning views, soft ground underfoot, extra speed from the downhill nature. This was trail running at its best. Always on the edge of falling over. Needing to watch every step, but at the same time running like a kid, if i hadn't have been running with Pete at this point, I may have just thrown my hands in air and shouted 'weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee' all the way down the hill.

It was now back on the obstacle course from Saturday's 10km, the course was much muddier after last nights down pour and being churned up by 4500 runners. This added so much to the course, all obstacles covered in a coating of slime, mad every vault, drag, pull, crawl and step, that little bit more challenging. The water dunks seems colder, smellier, and even managed to drain more energy today. Amazingly the integrity and quality of the obstacles was impeccable, no splinters, no breakages, no failures. This is a true testament to the skill and engineering of the course builders. Brave Sirs, BRA-bloody-VO!

Total Warrior 10 miles - Running through fire

The rest of the course remained unchanged, although the the water slide was longer due to wetter slicker grass at the base, causing another out of control slide. The final hill was a killer and went into Sunday plodder mode, and managed to run (slow jog / plod) all the way to the final wall. Pete was right on my heel and we were side by side on the final monkey bars. With my short arms and legs my feet couldn't touch the water, but with Pete's added lank he has lift his legs to keep his knees out the water. 2 days on the trot I've nailed the monkey bars, but Pete only managed to get half way.


What a privileged to run that course with the added trail run. I struggle to find anything wrong with the entire weekend but if the Total Warrior guys want a couple of  areas to improve on.

1. Water station on the 10 km was a little too close to an obstacle.
2. Add a bottle bar with plastic bottles to the beer tent.
3. Add a 'quite camping' area for those, like me, who are too old and grumpy to party all night after a race :)

That's it, that's all I can think of after being on site for 2 days, racing hard, and using the facilities. So close to perfection, its scary! Oh and there may have been a quite camping area, I just never asked.